Thursday, January 2, 2014

I am...

I Am...

I am a truth seeker
I am a servant
I am a universe of love
I am a child of God
I am known
I am unlimited
I am energy
I am still hungry!
I am an agent of change
I am a teacher
I am a guide
I am an explorer
I am priceless
I am vibrant!
I am grateful
I am as wide as the universe
I am wonderful
I am His hands
I am selfless
I am juiced!
I am at peace
I am kindness
I am compassion
I am empathy
I am still
I am beautiful
I am a real piece of work!
I am outlandish
I am special
I am connected
I am willing
I am humble
I am strong
I am courageous
I am aware
I am honest
I am grounded
I am consistent
I am daring
I am adventurous
I am whole
I am Ammon!

Wednesday, January 1, 2014

2013 Review

This is the first year I am writing an annual review. The question I want to ask myself, is "are my choices helping me to live the life I want.
1.What went well this year?
2. What didn't go well this year?
3. What am I working toward?
1.What went well this year?
We went on an adventure with our two kids to Costa Rica. I worked remotely and it was an experience! We got to go to AZ for Thanksgiving as well as take a few trips down to Zions.

Spirituality/Personal Development
I was able to bless our two daughters and become active in my calling going on lots of camp outs with of our ward. I stopped using adderall (which has been a crutch for me) and have been working on creating habits in all areas of life that will help us live the life we want. I have been more consistent with personal scripture study as well as personal prayers.
I have played on several soccer teams (Indoor) this year which has been a lot of fun. We have been fairly consistent at doing the Insanity workouts and starting back up again even after we have taken breaks due to illness and holidays.

I am working quite hard to create habits that will last whether or not I feel like doing something. I am doing a lot of listening to uplifting audiobooks which has been good, and I feel like I'm well on my way to creating some lasting habits that will increase the quality of our life.
I feel over the year end holidays we have connected with siblings and my parents which has been great. I know a large part of the wonderful holidays was due to the fact that I wasn't using adderall, and was more able to be myself.

Overall there has been more routine and stability this year, which considering the age of our kids and my somewhat bi-polar history, I think it is a good thing.

2. What didn't go well this year?

Work stayed pretty much the same, and I am making a little more money then last year. We haven't taken control of our finances and are very undisciplined with our money. We are still on about $100 of food stamps every month, but that is down from about $3-400 which is a great thing. I am spending most of every day at work which isn't ideal.
I feel like overall I haven't gotten terribly close to the lord this year or lived with Christs love very often. There have been a few bright spikes though.
Physical Condition
This has been the year of the energy drinks and corn chips. I have some extra fat around my middle for the first time in my life which I do not like. I have gone long periods with very little exercise.
We are still in our little apartment and it is stressful because it is often messy and we have two little girls. I would like to live somewhere nicer for my wife, the girls, and me.
3. What I am working toward
So what is all this leading to? Where am I going with my life?
Here are a few central themes that drive me:

  1. Purpose. I really want to drill down deep and figure out/discover my purposes for being here. I want to connect my deepest, truest purposes with every area of my life. I want to live my life with purpose which means having an understanding of why I do everything I do and how that relates to my purpose here on earth.
  2. Vision. I think this will be easier to develop after I am more aware of my purpose and mission. I want to wake up excited each day for an awesome future.
  3. Habits. I want to focus more on doing small habits then large end goals. I want to focus on the process of creating habits, knowing that these habits will lead to those large end goals.
  4. Creativity. I want to start playing my guitar and learning some new songs. I also want to start doing some photography and possibly creating some art in Photoshop. Mashing up music would be a lot of fun as well.
  5. Finances. I don't know if this is the year of the business or not. I do know that I want to have control over our finances and to be disciplined so we are proactive with our money. I feel like we might need to build a solid foundation/ have our own house in order before we undertake building a business. 

The Bottom Line
This year could have been better, but it is probably overall the best year I have had in terms of stability since I was young. I am cautiously optimistic about 2014, and I hope that I can really develop a strong foundation in all areas of my life. Instead of big dreams, this is the year of developing strong habits and acting instead of being acted upon.

-Ammon Hardin 1/1/2014